addendum to what i wrote in your yearbook

My eyes see nothing

past the fires

of burnt bridges

and the saviors that I seek

have already all been crucified

i've driven through the dark streets

and the anger in my eyes

kept me from seeing what i had

in you

the night was in slow motion

my world spinning around regrets

i've been trapped on the bridges

i've been trying to burn

and i've missed you.

The evangelists on Pier 39

give me pamphlets

and tell me Jesus loves me.

Someone should tell them Jesus is dead.

My grandfather may love me

that doesn't make him any more alive.

i scream

the apocalypse

is the new year's eve of the soul

and I

am so alone.

afraid of myself

of a destiny without a destination

of the real fucking world.

i know not what i've done.

But that's bullshit.

I know exactly what I've done.

And I am so sorry.

You aren't just her friend.

You are mine.

and the microphone doesn't just amplify words

it amplifies emotions.

And i'm sorry if i don't still live

in a year gone by.

but here,

today,

i do care about you.

Memories were meant to fade for a reason.